I have nothing to do

and I choose to embrace that by making bad decisions.

Example: Parties.
I generally show up late from work. And then I drink too much. And then this girl I know shows up, because I invited her. And I think about how bad of an idea it is to kiss her. Then I get really fucking excited because she actually came to see me at a party with all my friends (all five of them, and then all their friends). And then I say fuck it, try to kiss her anyway. Then I remember she's sort of my boss. And she tells me no. We all decide to leave to go to a bar/get food. Too drunk, go home instead. This is where all the vodka I drank to fast catches up with me in moment taken right out a movie about high school kids. I somehow wake up in time to go to work, check to make sure I have everything I had the night before. Clean up the mess I made. Remember why I don't really like going to parties. Remember why I stopped drinking vodka. Say hi, and sorry to the roommates, and the girls I didn't know were there. Then put some pants on. Take some cold medicine, and some aspirin. Pour some coffee. Hit the road. Work. Christmas party. Free drinks. Not vodka. Keep my self control MUCH better than the night prior. Stay just long enough to be seen, as to avoid being asked later why I didn't come to the fantastic work Christmas party. Get some much needed sleep.

I have a love/hate relationship with my life.

Also, new blog. Mostly about my writing. Words Wont Save Your Life. Also, I think I might get that tattooed on my chest. It's a lyric from a Hold Steady song. And it seems rather fitting for my life/thought process in general. Cool.